Okay, I can't bear it anymore. Fairlie's recent post has spurred me to say something. It's very simple, there are few exceptions. Here is M's official "I Studied Linguistics for Years so There" apostrophe tutorial:
Apostrophes are short cuts which show:
- Belonging, and
- Missing Bits
and that's about it. Actually, apostrophes are really just about missing bits. But humour me here.
Example of belonging: KelpieBlossom's new top is blue.
The apostrophe shortens the sentence "The top belonging to KelpieBlossom is blue" by replacing The and belonging to.
Example of missing bits: PadawanLearner didn't eat his vegetables tonight.
The apostrophe shortens the word "did not" to "didn't and indicates the "o" is missing.
Now here is the important bit:
Apostrophes do not indicate plurals. So, you don't need apostrophes such as pizza's, DVD's, orange's, apple's and eye's when pizzas, DVDs, oranges, apples and eyes are perfectly fine.
But I get it. You think these words look funny without an apostrophe so you put one in. Trust me, you are over-accessorising your words. Let context do its job for you.
Exceptions and disputes
1. Letters of the Alphabet used as words
Now, there are some disputes over apostrophes, even in grammar-nerd circles. For example, is there a case for the clarifying apostrophe? Should this sentence have apostrophes:
"Mind your P's and Q's"
The nerds are divided. Some say yes a clarifying apostrophe is needed because context can't always help eg. "He has trouble writing his as" vs "He has trouble writing his a's". Some say no provided you always use a capital letter "He has trouble writing his As"
2. Tricky ones, usually to do with questions of belonging
Is it Writer's Festival or Writers' Festival?
Is it Mother's Day or Mothers' Day?
No clear answer here. It's all too hard so I just omit the apostrophe altogether and let context do its (not it's) job. Some grammar-nerds will argue all day about this but I'm too tired.
3. Short nouns eg. do as in "event".
eg. "She always puts on great do's". These really fall into the category of clarifying apostrophes but there are so few of these that they almost don't count.
4. Belonging in words ending in 'S'
Is it "The princess's tiara fell off " or "The princess' tiara fell off" ?
Traditionally, there's no extra 'S'; but if the sentence is confusing without one then put one in. I've noticed a lot of modern authors are putting in 'S' after the apostrophe lately.
Do you disagree? Sorry not listening "lalalalalalalalalala" (fingers in ears)PS. be rest-assured that you are still my friend even if you over-accessorise your words :-)
source: my head.
disclaimer: wrong bits and poor grammar in this post are not my fault, it's Thursday and I've been to the Easter Parade, supervised School Band practise and hosted four marauding kids at my house all afternoon.
14 comments:
AMEN. See my 7 weird things post :)
Oh yay! You've saved me an hour or so typing up an e-mail to my grammatically-challenged brother. I'll send Wil El-dropper your way.
And I know you're tired (I read the fine print) but you know I can't miss an opportunity to remind you that in my opinion it is definitely a Writers Festival (no apostrophe at all). Yep, grammar nerd.
And, in the interests of completeness, do you think you could add a bit about it's and its?
Be still my beating heart...
If I were not already married to my Pete I might just marry YOU! Apostrophes are the bane of my existence. It is not that hard people... and quite frankly - if in doubt leave it OUT. You will most likely be correct without it.
Fairlie - yep, I'd leave the apostrophe on Writers Festival out too. And I didn't specifically tackle it's and its because, in the interests of brevity, I've lumped it (in my mind) with the belonging section. However, I coudl do a post on "common errors". That could go on for pages.
I could also spell "could" correctly.
I don't (note the missing bits apostrophe use) get why this is so confusing. The only that trips me up some is the clarifying apostrophe. And it doesn't happen all that frequently. Possessives and contractions people. And it's isn't plural. It is a CONTRACTION!! Bring grammar back to our schools, please. I will join your army M.
I love that I'm in a blog circle with grammar girls. Keeps me on my toes! I always get confused about whether there should be an apostrophe in "Mothers Group" and if so, where it would go, so I'm very glad you covered it here.
Keep up the good fight.
PS. Maybe you could summarise commas next. My English teacher once told me I needed to work on my commas. Not how, or in what way, mind. Just that they needed work.
I think I now understand. Shame primary school teachers did not teach it so clearly 30 odd years ago. It's taken me to nearly 37 to see how they are used. I usually just left them out all together.
Glad to be of service Mr El-dropper. Grammar was uncool in primary schools in "our era". And to be truthful a lot of grammar is uncool. I mean who really cares about subject/predicate etc? However, there are some good bits - and I count apostrophes as good bits.
Stomper Girl - I'm not the one to talk about commas. I'm a free-wheeling kind of hippy comma user and stick them in anywhere I like. I call it creative expression and depart from the grammar-nerds in this area.
this is great!
grammar not my strong point. Aussie bogan slang ... now there is a topic I know a little about...
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